Summertime brings a lot of family time. With family reunions, picnics, weddings and other events, long distant family members travel to gather together. It is also the perfect time to do some planning for the future. With parents aging and their health and lifestyles changing, children need to discuss some changes and decisions that will be needed in the near future. Parents should take the time to tell their children where important documents are kept and what their wishes are in the event of needing health care directives or experiencing long term care needs.
For those children who live away, the change they see in their parent’s health and mental capacity may be alarming — whereas siblings that have daily contact are working with these issues constantly. Here is the chance to compare notes and work together as a complete family in the long term care planning process.
For you parents who are well and active, this is a good time to hold a family meeting and share with your children your plan for long term care. Tell them where financial and legal documents are located or use our Legal and Financial Organizer. Review health care directives, living wills and long term care alternatives.
Experience has shown that even families that are close can quickly grow angry, jealous and hostile towards each other when an aging parent begins to need long term care. If a sibling moves into the parent’s home, others can easily be suspicious of ulterior motives and fear losing their inheritance. On the other hand, the child providing the elder care becomes bitter and feels there is no support or help from siblings. Developing a plan, before senior care becomes needed avoids these types of conflicts.
It can be helpful to have the meeting led by an impartial party, such as Aging Avenues who has experience with elder care issues. This helps put everyone on neutral ground. Aging Avenues can guide you through planning for the worst and how to try to prevent it, as well as what’s realistic in terms of care. Aging Avenues can offer you referrals to our network of Preferred Providers to assist you with everything from legal to choosing a facility. Having an impartial party is also ideal when family members don’t agree on the level of care needed.
Once you have agreed on a plan be sure to get everyone involved commitment to make it happen. This should help avoid someone forgetting what they agreed to do. Everyone has their specialty so if family members are out of town they can contribute by making necessary phone calls and the like There are many on-line sources that can keep distance family members involved. You can find them under Caregiver Support on our website www.agingavenues.com.
If you weren’t able to discuss what your loved one’s wishes were in advance but you need to react to a critical situation, Aging Avenues can help you make those choices quickly, without hours of searching and research. Our experience in the senior care industry gives you the valuable insight to make a sound decision and have peace of mind.
